Cinderella Ate My Daughter

The book stemmed from an article that Orenstein wrote for The New York Times Magazine in 2006 entitled "What's Wrong With Cinderella?"[2] In the article Orenstein relates her experiences as a mother, seeing her daughter exposed to a ubiquity of princesses and pink. The article explains the genesis of the Disney Princesses and the rise of the princess-themed merchandise and advertising.

Cinderella Ate My Daughter

Nothing can quite rock a woman's worldview like navigating through the New Girl Order with her own offspring. Peggy Orenstein has been writing about girls and women's issues since the 1980s. In her books the best-selling author has explored the minds of "Schoolgirls" and the feminist state of "Flux." But in her already much-praised new book "Cinderella Ate My Daughter: Dispatches From the Front Lines of the New Girlie-Girl Culture," the mother of 7-year-old daughter Daisy investigates firsthand the market domination of princesses and pink, the slutification of tweens, and how social networking became the favored tool of a new generation of Mean Girls. It's a gripping, hilariously horrifying account of battling for your child's soul in the toy aisle, one that excoriates consumer culture while sympathizing with parents trying to make sense of it all.

As a mother of two young Barbie-loving daughters myself, I was riveted by Orenstein's blend of self-deprecation and outrage -- and eager to talk to her during the New York City leg of her book tour about baby princesses, the insidiousness of pink and, of course, Hannah Montana.

We all live in the world. There was a story in the Times a few months ago about how little girls who watch "Hannah Montana" are more likely to bully, but kids whose parents try to make them behave more age appropriately are likelier to be bullied. You don't want to have either of those scenarios. Our job is to raise our daughters to be thoughtful and inquisitive and ask questions, and I can see already the ways my 7-year-old is doing that.

Places like Salon. And Jezebel, and Slate. The fact that people are writing and having conversations about these issues. That's very important. My daughter Daisy, and how seeing smart and strong she is. The women I know who are complicated and conflicted and caring. That's what gives me hope.

You know, my daughter was the freaking QUEEN of Disney Princess dress up, she had all the movies, blah blah. But she is the furthest thing from that now. She has grown into her own person, she almost never wears a dress even, and because of cross country goes to class with her HAIR WET!!! Hell, I wouldn't have even done that. I do agree that marketing towards young girls is not a real good influence but they are always going to have somebody in their face trying to make them think a certain way, so the sooner they can think for themselves the better.

Pink and pretty or predatory and hardened, sexualized girlhood influences our daughters from infancy onward, telling them that how a girl looks matters more than who she is. Somewhere between the exhilarating rise of Girl Power in the 1990s and today, the pursuit of physical perfection has been recast as a source—the source—of female empowerment. And commercialization has spread the message faster and farther, reaching girls at ever-younger ages.

But, realistically, how many times can you say no when your daughter begs for a pint-size wedding gown or the latest Hannah Montana CD? And how dangerous is pink and pretty anyway—especially given girls' successes in the classroom and on the playing field? Being a princess is just make-believe, after all; eventually they grow out of it. Or do they? Does playing Cinderella shield girls from early sexualization—or prime them for it? Could today's little princess become tomorrow's sexting teen? And what if she does? Would that make her in charge of her sexuality—or an unwitting captive to it?

Those questions hit home with Peggy Orenstein, so she went sleuthing. She visited Disneyland and the international toy fair, trolled American Girl Place and Pottery Barn Kids, and met beauty pageant parents with preschoolers tricked out like Vegas showgirls. She dissected the science, created an online avatar, and parsed the original fairy tales. The stakes turn out to be higher than she—or we—ever imagined: nothing less than the health, development, and futures of our girls. From premature sexualization to the risk of depression to rising rates of narcissism, the potential negative impact of this new girlie-girl culture is undeniable—yet armed with awareness and recognition, parents can effectively counterbalance its influence in their daughters' lives.

"[Peggy Orenstein's] addictively readable book manages, somehow, to be simultaneously warm and chilling"--Rebecca Traister, author of Big Girls Don't Cry: The Election that Changed Everything for American Women "I wish I'd had Peggy Orenstein's thought-provoking, wise, and entertaining new book, Cinderella Ate My Daughter, to comfort me and to help me navigate the Pepto Bismol pink aisles of the toy store and the cotton candy pink channels of the TV dial. Every mother needs to read this."--Ayelet Waldman, author of Bad Mother "Reading "Cinderella" is like hanging out with a straight-talking, hilarious friend; taking a fascinating seminar on 21st century girlhood; and discovering a compendium of wise (but never preachy) advice on raising girls. A must-read for any parent trying to stay sane in a media saturated world."--Rachel Simmons, author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl Reading "Cinderella" is like hanging out with a straight-talking, hilarious friend; taking a fascinating seminar on 21st century girlhood; and discovering a compendium of wise (but never preachy) advice on raising girls. A must-read for any parent trying to stay sane in a media saturated world. --Rachel Simmons, author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl" I wish I d had Peggy Orenstein s thought-provoking, wise, and entertaining new book, Cinderella Ate My Daughter, to comfort me and to help me navigate the Pepto Bismol pink aisles of the toy store and the cotton candy pink channels of the TV dial. Every mother needs to read this. --Ayelet Waldman, author of Bad Mother" [Peggy Orenstein s] addictively readable book manages, somehow, to be simultaneously warm and chilling --Rebecca Traister, author of Big Girls Don't Cry: The Election that Changed Everything for American Women" Orenstein has played a defining role in giving voice to this generation of girls and women . At times this book brings tears to your eyes tears of frustration with today s girl-culture and also of relief because somebody finally gets it and is speaking out on behalf of our daughters. --Judith Warner, author of "Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety"" -I wish I'd had Peggy Orenstein's thought-provoking, wise, and entertaining new book, Cinderella Ate My Daughter, to comfort me and to help me navigate the Pepto Bismol pink aisles of the toy store and the cotton candy pink channels of the TV dial. Every mother needs to read this.---Ayelet Waldman, author of Bad Mother -[Peggy Orenstein's] addictively readable book manages, somehow, to be simultaneously warm and chilling---Rebecca Traister, author of Big Girls Don't Cry: The Election that Changed Everything for American Women -Reading Cinderella is like hanging out with a straight-talking, hilarious friend; taking a fascinating seminar on 21st century girlhood; and discovering a compendium of wise (but never preachy) advice on raising girls. A must-read for any parent trying to stay sane in a media saturated world.---Rachel Simmons, author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl -Orenstein has played a defining role in giving voice to this generation of girls and women.... At times this book brings tears to your eyes--tears of frustration with today's girl-culture and also of relief because somebody finally gets it--and is speaking out on behalf of our daughters.---Judith Warner, author of Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety "Reading Cinderella is like hanging out with a straight-talking, hilarious friend; taking a fascinating seminar on 21st century girlhood; and discovering a compendium of wise (but never preachy) advice on raising girls. A must-read for any parent trying to stay sane in a media saturated world."--Rachel Simmons, author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl "Orenstein has played a defining role in giving voice to this generation of girls and women.... At times this book brings tears to your eyes--tears of frustration with today's girl-culture and also of relief because somebody finally gets it--and is speaking out on behalf of our daughters."--Judith Warner, author of Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety

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